My Blog

Its mostly my paranoia against pain and my defensive strategies to ward off deception, betrayal and heartbreak that come as ghosts waiting to strike a knife in my heart.I question your real capacity to give love and affection. I don’t think you have understood it the way, we the fucked up ones are beginning to accept and understand that there is nothing to hold on to. And because, once I fall in love I immediately switch to the anticipation of pain that I can never feel at ease with living. Now, I remember why the fuck I am so uncomfortable with love is because I know that I am incapable of it. I cannot give and not expect, even if I can’t give as much.
The little betrayals translate into whole-day obsessions and pains.
unreturned call, shift in the voice, a withdrawal of touch and small drop of human temperature, subtle indications of lapse.